In an instant your emotions can go from high to very low, and even though the trigger point can be totally inconsequential when analysed, unless you understand what is actually happening, it can really screw you up BIG time.
Let me explain what happened to me yesterday.
Arriving home from a number of appointments in Essex I opened up my emails to see one from head office asking me to call a client based in Lincoln.
Although I originally set this client up many years ago, due to restructuring, they are no longer in my patch. So I called the office to find out more. It appeared that they would not deal with the consultant who is now responsible for their account…in fact they would only deal with me.
So as you can imagine I got a little bit of an adrenalin hit as the feel-good hormones flooded my body. Being liked after all is a nice feeling. So I made the call, sorted this particularly wonderful client…Job done…the end of another thoroughly productive and enjoyable day…or so I thought.
The next email I opened was a list of clients who I had visited since Christmas, who as yet had not returned some paperwork, which was required before the end of the financial year…
Could you chase these was the underlining message.
So working from the top (there were only 7 companies on the list) I systematically called each one. It was late in the day, so some of my contacts had already left the office, although the couple who I did manage to speak to said that they would sort it first thing in the morning…with one call left I would soon be taking our crazy hound Ralph across the meadow, before heading home for a relaxing supper (which might include a glass of vino)…bliss.
So it was with this thought, I opened the file for the last call of the day…FUCK…that was my first reaction when I read the notes as my sub-conscious triggered a tidal-wave of stress hormones…today had certainly gone tits up!!
A few weeks ago I was asked to visit a construction firm in Essex…it was my first appointment with this company as one of the other consultants had set them up. My meeting was with the HR manager, a young girl, with an attitude. The meeting didn’t go particularly well, I found her hard work and quite arrogant. Consequently, I was more than happy with the thought that we would not be meeting again any time soon as I drove onto my next meeting.
In the notes, the client had phoned the day after our meeting and said that because of a conflict between myself and the HR manageress, they wanted the original consultant to revisit to run through the restructuring.
Now here’s the rub.
Rationally and logically I couldn’t give a toss about this individual. Sometimes you just don’t hit it off with another, so accept that and move on. I reasoned that neither she nor I set out on that day to have a meeting which would be less than pleasant. These things happen. I totally 100% get that. But my subconscious doesn’t. As far as it is concerned the notes represented a threat and as the subconscious doesn’t differentiate between a life threatening or non-life threatening event, it will fire chemicals that will seriously screw up the rest of your day.
That is how ridiculous this is and why nature made a complete bollocks when designing the human mind. But even more it demonstrates why it is essential for the health of modern man that you understand this.
Today as I walked Ralph I could still feel the effects of this ‘attack’ in the depth of my stomach and it will be a few hours still before the chemicals are completely flushed out. The only saviour is that I now understand that the feeling is a complete lie, and has no bearing on reality. I will not spend any more time giving it any credence because to do so would simply provide it with more power to attack me.