Don’t ever, ever, ever let anyone, including yourself, convince you that you can’t change…its a big stonking lie but many of us are so entrenched into this belief, that the consequence is having a devastating and, in some cases, life-threatening impact on the relationship we have with ourselves…and others.
I can still remember that day, at Primary School, when Mr Russell, the head master, came into our class to collect the 3 ‘thickies’, who every week would be treated to an hour of ‘special’ one to one tuition with him to try and bring them up to speed with the rest of us. On every occasion, until that day, the rest of the class kinda grew in stature (well I certainly did) as the 3 were lead away, because even for a class of 9 years olds the desire to succeed had already been ingrained into our subconscious and I think silently we all liked the idea that we were better than our 3 rather stupid colleagues…children can be so cruel!!
So on this day, as Mr Russell entered the classroom as he had done on all previous occasions he called out the names of the 3…but on this particular day a fourth name was added…MINE.
Even as I write I can feel the hairs on the back of my neck start to stand on end, as they did on that ‘life changing’ day and even 50+ years on I can still remember the dreadful feeling that consumed my body as I was led away…with the sound of the sniggers from my class-mates ringing in my ears…And although as it turned out I only sat in on two sessions because Mr Russell realised that I wasn’t as thick as he thought, for me the damage was done, the experience was so traumatic that the programme deep in my sub-conscious immediately embraced this experience as fact, and from that day on my thoughts and subsequent behaviours, would be moulded by this self-sabotaging belief.
Richard Crisp – The Author
So perhaps you will understand just how ridiculous that sounded to me when I overheard someone say isn’t Richard Crisp that author bloke? Where are you now Mr Russell?
Throughout my adult life I struggled with reading and writing the English language, based purely on a programme that I acquired at the age of 9, and therefore the idea that I could write anything of worth, was never on my radar. And yet against a whole load of internal negative struggles while running successful businesses or working for others I have been forced into writing copious amounts of copy; whether it be business plans, conceptual ideas, press releases or simple emails or letters, and whilst I still ask Mrs C to proof read anything of significant, the reality is, my ridiculous beliefs about my inabilities have no bearing on the reality. But it took me over bloody 50 years to understand this and you know what that really does piss me off (excuse my French) because if nothing else these crazy beliefs deprived me of fully appreciating the wonderful life I was having.
So here I was, a middle-aged husband, father and grandad, with a beautiful home in rural Norfolk and an amazing job which rewarded me well appearing to have the perfect life. But behind this ‘facade of success’ I was finding it increasingly difficult to deal from the physical and psychological consequences of the civil war that was being waged in my head…day after day after day. Having destroyed my thyroid the effects of the toxic hormones that were flooding my body had started to wreak havoc with my immune system and GUT… so to do nothing was no longer an option.
Now I can’t remember exactly which day it was, but I do remember waking up to the reality that unless I waged war on my inner demons then I was destined to be controlled for the rest of my life by a set of ridiculous thoughts and behaviours which not only were serving me so badly, but more worryingly were responsible for driving my anxiety and stress levels through the stratosphere.
For the next year I read many books, spent hours researching the internet, attended lectures and listened to countless CDs and gradually, very gradually I started to find answers and then solutions, to my ridiculous behaviour patterns and in doing so discovered so much about the mechanics of the human mind that I felt compelled to put pen to paper in the hope that I might help others deal with their own but certainly not unique internal struggles.
During my darkest time when approached by well-meaning friends I played the ‘isn’t life wonderful card’, for fear that to tell the truth “Crap thanks how’s your life been?” would somehow influence their opinion of me. The title of my book was born.
Crap thanks, is a simple man’s guide to finding simple answers to the complexities of the human mind.
It tells the story of Eamon (A Man), the first prototype human to set foot on planet earth. The aim of Eamon’s creators was to create an animal that would tame and manage the world’s resources. But during his early days Eamon became the favoured meal for a very aggressive and ravenous tiger and so the creators were tasked with designing and incorporating many defence mechanisms into Eamon’s brain which would ultimately change the balance of power. After two thousand years the experiment was completed. Eamon had no equals…and as far as his creators were concerned their job was done.
But they were wrong. Soon woman would be introduced into the fray and the human population would grow and whilst the survival skills that Eamon had learned would prove to be instrumental in aiding man to dominate the planet, on the flip-side man was totally ill-equipped to deal with the mental and psychological problems that would result from his dominance and subsequent drive for wealth, the consequence of which would prove to have a potentially devastating impact on his very survival.
Put simply man’s prehistoric brain was never designed to deal with the complexities of the modern world…Eamon and his immediate family were in serious trouble and so with much haste, for his creators, it was back to the drawing board…
“Crap Thanks” is currently available on Amazon (priced £9.99 plus postage) and if they (Amazon) can pull their finger out and respond to my simple question, then it will also be available also in a kindle format.
I also have copies at home which I’ll gladly post to you at cost!
Email: firstname.lastname@example.org and we will send secure PayPal details if you’d like to buy a copy!